Defining a Texan
Defining a Texan:
Not long ago, I met an old rodeo Cowboy in George West. We were discussing how you know if someone’s a real Texan.
He said, “Well, I think all you gotta do is ask a few questions.”
Intrigued, I asked, “Like what kind of questions?”
“Well,” he said, “like this:
You ever seen the big Texas sun rise up over the oil derricks of the Gulf, and turn em to gold, and found that beautiful?
You ever laid back on Emory peak, under the starry skies of Big Bend, and reached up and touched God’s first day’s work?
You ever driven the country roads just to see the wild flowers celebrating Spring,or floated down the Guadalupe with a cold beer on hot summer’s day?
Ever eaten three alarm chili in Terlingua tamped down with Pan de Campo?
Ever eat a Dilly watermelon or Poteet Strawberries or Hill Country Peaches, so good they made you cry?
You got Blue Bell in your Freezer right now, and a back-up quart just in case?
Is Southwest, to you, the National Airline of Texas?
Do you feel a gnawing sadness when you leave the state and a reborn joy when you make it back?
Ever had beef enchiladas on the River Walk, chicken fried steak in Abilene, with cream gravy, or a Shiner Bock in Shiner?
You ever see Staubach or Aikman bring the BOYS back from the dead?
You see Earl Campbell run like a blustery wind in the Astrodome, or see Nolan Ryan pitch a heart-stoppin’ no hitter?
Do you know that Houston is the World’s Doctor?
Are you equally comfortable with hola and howdy?
Do you like jalapenos on your Whataburger, for breakfast?
Ever take a date to the Dairy Queen?
Does Austin seems normal to you?
Do you love the smell of Orange Blossoms on the March wind or Purple Sage, after a thunderstorm?
Is Lonesome Dove the best mini-series there ever was?
Is your favorite President Sam Houston?
Did you ever sit in reverent silence at the Alamo in gratitude for the gift they gave?
You ever drive through the gritty haze of a West Texas Sand Storm, spurred on by ZZ TOP?
Ever been caught out in the open by a Blue Norther on the Llano Estacado?
Do you love a second helping of Frito Pie under Friday Night Lights?
Do you cheer the bronc rider and running back with equal fervor?
Ever ridden your horse through the Drive through?
Ever go to Spring Break at South Padre and woke up face down in beer-soaked sand or partied in a border town til you couldn’t find the bridge again?
You have a Lone Star Flag flying in your yard?
Is HEB your pantry?
Do you see yourself as a Texan first and just incidentally American?
You ever worn worn out boots too long, or been saddle sore, or owned an old pickup that you knew was out of oil cuz it wouldn’t leakin’ any?
You think mesquite makes everything taste better?
Ever two-stepped to Willie in a dance hall that smelled of saw dust?
When America the Beautiful plays, you think about Texas?
Did you smile when you learned the Texas capital was taller than the national capital?
Do you believe the Piney Woods are prettier than any forest in Colorado?
Do you think Texas is about half the size oughta be on the U.S. map?
If you can say yes to most all these things,” he said, “then you have the right, the honor, to proudly call yourself, A TEXAN.”
I think the ol’ boy had a point.